Skip to main content

People are Complex.


Photo credit: Cash Macanaya on Unsplash



Do you write people off or do you take them as they?


While on my much-needed hiatus, I was able to do some introspection about life, people, and the spaces I occupy presently. 

Photo by Dom Aguiar on Unsplash


Earlier this year, I experienced a great betrayal (at one point or another, most of us have experienced this or will - it is part of life). I won't go into much detail, but it was from someone I held very dear and in high esteem. In the end, I realized that not everyone sees you as you see them. 
People are complex - not complicated but dynamic. 

Photo by Jeffery Erhunse on Unsplash



If we are honest, we will admit that the people in our lives hold different roles for different folks. Someone we may deem as a hero in our story may very well be a villain in someone else's. I am sure that you have played a villainous role in someone's life. And that is perfectly fine because people are complex - multifaceted.  

Take a moment to think of the most intolerable person you know (the bad boy or gangster down the street who is always causing trouble, or your unappreciative bosses). Each of these individuals is loved intensely by someone. They may very well be a hero in the eyes of their loved ones. They are human with real fears and emotions like you. 


Photo by Guilherme Stecanella on Unsplash


When we realize that people are complex and ever-evolving, we will save ourselves time and forgo heartbreak. We label others as "good" or "bad" when in reality, we all have desirable and undesirable qualities. 

If we are honest, sometimes we demonize people or give them angel wings before getting to know them. Surprisingly, monsters can save lives, and angels can break hearts. 

Photo credit: Jackson David on Unsplash 


Perhaps it is time we stop thinking of people as being exclusively "good" or "bad" and start thinking of them for what they are - complex. Because "good" people can let us down, and "bad" people tend to save lives. 


Thank you for showing up. Love and light to you. 
 
Labels:

Comments

  1. NovieDecember 11, 2021 at 11:37 AM

    Every coin has 2 sides. Every person can be seen through different lens. You're right my love. If we just see people as complex then we can erase the labels of good and bad. Complex covers the black, the white and the in between. Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ErwinDecember 12, 2021 at 8:31 AM

    I tend to look at everyone as me. I know my mixed emotions, mixed pleasures, mixed interests, moods and times. Therefore I don't expect too much from people yet I give them the benefit of their own time.

    However, even with this approach, it is still difficult to forgo heartbreak. Especially when it peeps through the smallest window that you let down your guard.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It Is Okay To Rest.

 Rest  Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash I recently rang a relative to wish her happy birthday and asked her what she planned to do for the day. She candidly replied, "Work. We are a hard-working family, remember?"  She was telling the truth. I grew up watching my family till the soil with their bare hands, after all "by the sweat our brow" we had to eat. There is nothing wrong with working hard to provide for yourself and others but at what cost? I decided a long time ago that would not be my narrative.  Balance  Photo by Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash  I know what it means to work yourself to the ground. I know what it means to grind and hustle. I know what it means to get caught up in the horrors and toxicity of capitalism. I had to watch my mother do it and, for a while, I inherited that culture.  But there is nothing wrong with laying it down and walking away to redefine productivity.  I know what it means to work myself to exhaustion but, I...
14 comments
Read more

Changing the Narrative!

Annie Spratt on Unsplash I once wrote a poem about succulents. But the truth is I was writing about myself and my story. Indeed, I had come a long way and progress looked good on me. (Poem can be found in my book Bonfire available on Amazon.com) As we celebrated the stories of many women and how they changed the narrative, I began thinking of my story. Many will try to convince you that they know me or know my story. But albeit, I beg to differ. The truth is no one knows my story like I know my story. And no one can tell my story like I can tell my story.  I never wanted to become a teacher; that was my mother's dream and pretty soon it became mine. I handled that dream like it was an heirloom or a rite of passage. Something handed down to me and by all means, it would enable me to lift the family name, rinse it from the mud and hold it towards the sun.  Teaching would be easy. Everyone would be proud. They would all be happy for me. These were my thoughts. This was not so an...
4 comments
Read more

A Journey of a Thousand Miles

I recently had one of my senior students ask me, "Is life really a journey?" The question posed to me by someone almost half my age, really made me think. How often have we stopped to think of this overused yet true analogy.  "Is life really a journey?" A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. – Lao Tzu If you can’t fly, then run, if you can’t walk run, then walk, if you can’t walk, then crawl, but by all means keep moving. – Martin Luther King Jr. What about life makes it a fitting comparison to a journey (of any kind)? To journey means to travel from place to another. A voyage. A trip. An expedition. Those who embark on such trips are often referred to as pilgrims, travelers or sojourners.   In its own way, life can be said to be a journey. We embark on this journey, the moment we have been birthed into this world. From birth until our death, we should have traveled from one point to another. Whether it be as a result of personal...
4 comments
Read more